The Weekly Whatever: Guaranteed World Cup Free
$8chan
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Elon Musk turns up expecting to be adored by Dave Chapelle’s fans, but gets roundly booed instead.
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Three members of Twitter’s Trust and Safety Council resign. Elon smears the former head of the group by insinuating that he’s a pedophile, then disbands the entire organization.
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Twitter targeted women and people on family leave for layoffs. Yeah, there’s a lawsuit.
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Remaining Twitter staff warn potential employees to stay away.
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Elton John leaves Twitter; Elon begs him to stay.
Crapto
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FTX staff coordinated in a secret chat group called “Wirefraud”.
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Ironically, the Dutch are now using Bitcoin mining to grow tulips.
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You paid money for Coachella NFTs? Oops, they’re gone.
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Cryptocurrency millionaires built systems which helped organized criminals launder money. Now as the money is lost to fraud, they’re mysteriously suffering fatal accidents.
Law and order
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Florida deputy police officer plays around with his gun, fatally shoots another deputy.
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Tampa police chief is in a golf cart stopped for driving on a highway. She flashes her badge and asks if she and the driver can be let go.
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New Zealand man poses as blonde woman, convinces police officer to hand over his patrol car and body armor.
Other news
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Everyone in South Korea is suddenly younger.
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The last Jumbo Jet has left the factory.
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Unlike America, Germany arrests extremists who try to overthrow the government and sabotage the electricity supply.
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People who believe in conspiracy theories massively overestimate how much other people agree with them.