It's been a while.
Almost six months into 2015 already. Halfway through an entire year. The time, it passes quickly. I turned 37 in March. Time, as elders have told me before, accelerates as you get older. They may or may not have left out the exponentially part.
I'm feeling it a little. Okay, maybe a lot. The past two years have worn in some. Upon deeper reflection, I can attribute this to a few things: increased responsibilities, family stresses, work-career questions, the search for what's next, but also the physical tolls of a life that likes to stay as active as possible and happens to be on the move a lot.
I'm - and I really should mean we, meaning my wife and I - are in search of some kind of balance between the responsibilities we have to ourselves and our families, but also that yearning for a simpler life. It's at odds with each other though - one means you have to plan for the future, and with others in mind. That means you have to place things in motion and that complicates things, but you've got that plan, that loose roadmap, that fallback. On the other hand, all that stuff makes you want to let go, at least mentally, from all of this... baggage? The precarious balance between being comfortable with it all versus saying eff it and losing it on the farm.
Nothing gets figured out in a way. The script is never finalized and finished. Life is a work in progress that we're constantly tinkering with, or provides paths that we have to choose from. You gain a better understanding for what shapes you at the time most recent, but likely, very few things are cold hard truths to you. Your mind changes, along with the world. Evolving masses surging together.
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Currently in heavy rotation:
01.
The Gyre - Carthasy
If you take someone who sings a bit, add a bit of TOOL and ISIS (the band!), but with more melody, you get this. Totally up my alley of course. And a cover of Sneaker Pimps' 6 Underground! http://rd.io/x/QFwmPnw1BA/
02.
SFO > KUL: Side B
This is a playlist I made for our upcoming trip to Malaysia at the end of the month. During sleep on planes, I like to listen to really mellow playlists. Something rhythmic, but soothing too. I have a Side A planned too.
http://rd.io/x/QFwmL49g_g/
(If you have recommendations for something in the same vein, feel free to reply. Milosh and Tycho is probably the best example of what these songs should sound like.)
03.
Entire Catalog - Butterfingers
Buterfingers were/are a band from Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia. They were friends of ours, and my old band, Monkeywrench were to tour with them back in 98, on their first tour. We never did because I left to the States to come study (and eventually settle). My bandmates were pissed with me about it at the time, but we've let that go and are still friends today (sidenote: you can see us reunited here, playing together, 15 years later - https://vimeo.com/49000288).
Anyway, Butterfingers: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Butterfingers_(Malaysian_band)
While we were a Helmet-ish band, Butterfingers were heavily influenced by Nirvana. A lot of their early albums channel the Cobain spirit before they started to evolve and integrate Malaysian rhythms, sounds, and switching from English to Malay.
I still love 'em. And their evolution has been fantastic. I wish I had a way to point you to their stuff, but I've got old tapes/CDs and torrents that I've pulled years ago to collect their stuff.
Wait. The internet provides.
This is the only song on Rdio available (which pains me): http://rd.io/x/QFwmK0Ei668/
But there's a pretty good playlist on Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/user/epilogueepic/playlist/5FcKPxhozMB0hHqtnrNmIQ
The title of this Tinyletter comes from the lyric in this song, Delirium, which I love: https://open.spotify.com/track/6YQuWNUoa7MwcSr8ualBOG
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Thanks for reading. Malaysia's coming up again, soon. And travels means lots of fodder for this.
See ya then, tailwinds!
Naz.