monday, twenty-six july: four of pentacles
It’s Drunk Bee Season in the backyard. There’s a tree in the neighbor’s yard that drops these little yellow-green flowers. It drops a million of them–in the neighbor’s yard, you practically can’t see the ground. It looks like it’s snowing when the wind blows. We’re not carpeted to the same extent, but it’s a lot of little flowers. When they’re on the ground, we get a lot of bees–a wide range of bees! Big fat bumblebees, regular sting-y looking yellow bees, yesterday I saw some giant kind of bee like I’d never seen before. The bees come, they bop around on the ground sticking their little bee faces into these fallen flowers, and then the bees stay, rolling drunkenly around on the ground. I don’t know what these flowers are or why they affect the bees so much. (Some googling suggests that it might be a linden tree? But it might not.) I do know that we have a week or so every year where you can’t go barefoot in the backyard, and you can’t go out at all unless you’ve been sweeping up the flowers. Yesterday we counted well over twenty bees rolling around on the ground just on patio area right outside the door.
Drunk Bee Season is annoying, what with the danger of getting stung, but it’s also kind of hilarious. This year it’s also a little wistful, since it’s our last Drunk Bee Season in this apartment. After fourteen years in north Brooklyn, we’re moving to the Bronx later this fall–Dec and I will be able to walk to school. We don’t have a closing date or a moving date yet, that’s all in process still, but papers have been signed and money has changed hands and I can finally stop feeling all in-betweeny and tentative.
Today’s card is relevant in its own way–the guide says the Four of Pentacles is material success and stability, but with a warning to not become possessive or controlling. The picture on the card is things wrapped up with strings, things tied together. I have so many feelings all tied up together about this move. Mostly I’m very excited, I love the house, but we’re tangled up in our current neighborhood and it’s going to hurt to disentangle ourselves. I mean, we’re just moving to another part of the same city, it’s not like we can’t ever come back, but it’s a big city and it’s a big change. (How many times, over the eight years we’ve been in this current apartment, I’ve sat in the backyard and thought, this is good.)