Small Wins
I’m going through this phase where I have in mind all of the long term goals I want to achieve that would create some semblance of a career and life arc I could work towards. Not because I want the perfect life, but I at least want some direction and center after being really spontaneous for a lot of my life.
To explain my goals further, I would like to finish my masters and then do another one to be more specialized. By the summer of 2021, I would have two masters degrees. One in management information systems, one in health informatics. I would also hopefully have 4 years of project management experience by that point. I think at that point, with no outstanding debts, I would have a lot of flexibility and freedom in my career. If I’m still with my girlfriend at that time, she would be done with her fellowship and be able to practice as an ER doctor. We would both be able to have a whole life ahead of us. I’m not sure if that would mean staying in Birmingham, though for me, 25 years to retirement at UAB is a nice track to be on because retiring at 52 under the Alabama TRS would be nice.
I understand that things don’t always go to plan. It’s also funny that this is my plan for my education and my career. No less than 5 years ago did I try to tell everyone that unless if you were specializing in a trade, it didn’t matter about what your degree was, just who you knew. That kind of worked for me and then I got tired of it and felt like going the traditional, somewhat safe route. The one where it’s easy to tell people what you’re doing and they can look at your degrees and be like oh I know what to do with you.
I was talking with my mom on Sunday night, and I was explaining how I’m actually really happy with how things are going in my life. I have awesome parents, I have an awesome girlfriend, I have a job I’m really grateful for after my career thus far, I have a 3.75 GPA and I’m two semesters/four classes from graduating in December, I have a pretty solid routine, I’m eating a lot better nowadays and generally being a lot healthier (I actually choose fruits and salads as my sides now!! And I’ve been drinking a ton of water and no coffee or soda, or at least, significantly limiting how much I have). The only thing I need to work on is exercising. I just paid $75 for a year of Zyp bikeshare in Birmingham and have been using it every day. I bike around 3-4 miles a day at least I think. I need to do other exercising though too.
Yet, despite all of the above, I’m like really tired and bored. I’m tired all of the time. I’m not depressed I don’t think because I can at least get out of my bed and be excited and motivated to do things. I’m just bored. Like, I don’t think I have a hobby that doesn’t involve a screen.
The thing that’s bothering me more is that I want to pick up a new hobby but I’m not sure what it is. I remember having this problem last year, and my cousin told me to just do something. Anything. I find myself back at that point. The problem is I feel if I pick up a hobby right now, I’ll be stressed out with work, school, new hobby, and everything else. The stress of the idea of learning something new is holding me back.
But I need a small win now more than ever. Something to get me through between now and my long term goals. I can’t get to those goals unless if I take steps towards them. And if I’m not motivated, or if I’m flat out bored with nothing to look forward to, I worry that it’ll negatively impact those long term goals.
Small wins for my job are things I can figure out easily. Small wins for my schooling happen whenever I do an assignment well, turn it in and get a good grade. Small wins for my girlfriend are when I can put a smile on her face. Small wins for my parents are when I can make them feel proud.
What about small wins for just myself?
Do you have any suggestions? I want something pretty specific. I like doing things with groups, but I feel like I need something for just me. For a long time, playing Rock Band was that for me. I can go back to that but I want to do something different because I feel like I reached my skill peak in Rock Band. I need something that there is a community for but I can do peacefully and be in my own thoughts. Woodworking was one idea, but I don’t know. It seems kind of expensive. Though I’m sure any hobby is expensive the more time you spend at it.