First Day of School
This is my first first day of school in a physical classroom as a learner in six years. As seen from the results of a class survey, I’m feeling anxious like everyone else. I feel a major difference between me as a student 10 years ago, and me as one now.
I am very much in the middle of the pack in this cohort.
At the beginning of a semester, I always used to feel like I was near the top in any given classroom. Lots of ego.
This time around, I am the average age of the group, have the average number of degrees each students has, and the diversity of the cohort is very mixed. Basically, there’s nothing about me that stands out, but there’s also nothing that makes me at the very bottom. There are some people who already have doctorates or things like Pharm.D’s, and there are some people who are just graduating from undergrad (and someone who has no degree!). There are some people who have healthcare experience, and some people who’ve never worked in healthcare. Everyone has a story to tell about why they’re here.
I don’t know what it is, but this feeling is very freeing to me. You check your ego at the door. You immediately respect everyone in the room because they deserve to be in here. You don’t try to be the best person ever or try to compete with anyone else in the room. You are just doing your best to learn at your pace and make yourself know the material in a way that makes sense to you. You get to be you. Everyone is just here to learn and grow.
A part of me wonders why I’m not like this all the time. Another part of me wants to insert myself into these types of situations more often.
Who knows? Maybe when I hopefully finish the program in two years, more doors will open up for me and I’ll get to experience this feeling again and again.