hey there reader,
i’m hoping that you’re easing into spring as best as U can. i’ve been appreciating the warmer temperatures, the singing birds, and intermittent rainshowers, but for all the natural opening and revival the earth is experiencing, i find myself withdrawing. i’m contending with a sense of uncertainty for the months to come while still trying to plan ahead, so it’s been a lot of solitude and stillness at the crib.
beyond my need for introspection though, it feels slightly treacherous to be outside this time of year. as we approach the 1-year mark of George Floyd’s murder last summer, i’m heavily reminded of the sting of pepper spray that cops blasted on us in the blistering heat at the uprisings. on the same day that the guilty verdict for his killer was announced this month, Columbus Police killed 16-year-old Ma’Khia Bryant. a baby who called them for help, only to have her life stolen from her. the cyclical nature of how we die, are robbed of justice, and then die again was put so cruelly on display. the violence against us just compounds and compounds. Blackness, not excluding that belonging to children, is a marker for death in this city. it’s a marker for death everywhere.
our people are being (and have been) sent into ancestorhood way ahead of when they should be, and in ways that are deeply traumatic. in trying to grapple with the spritiual consqeuences of generationally-experienced Black death and displacement within my own family, i was led to a practice of ancestor veneration. this practice has been a source of
intergenerational, multidimensional healing because as i extend love, care, and gratitude towards them, i can feel them offering the same towards me. tarot is currently my primary medium of communication with my spirits, but my connection to the cards has waned in the past, mainly when i was using a standard Smith-Waite deck. even though my self-readings would be accurate, i began feeling uncomfortable about my use of images of whiteness within Black-centric rituals. i’ve since switched to , one of many examples of Black diviners who have created decks for us as a way to reaffirm our magic and combat the overwhelming imprint of whiteness. i believe that re-interpreting Blackness onto tarot isn’t simply an aesthetic necessity, but also an ontological one. if tarot is meant to serve as a trustworthy wayfaring technology for Black people, then the logic of the cards must reveal truths that are inseparable from an atmosphere that is metaphysically hostile towards Black people. nothing exists in a vacuum.